CONFESSION

ALL THIS HAPPENED WHEN I WAS IN MY THIRD YEAR. I HAD STOPPED CARING ABOUT SCHOOL, LOVE AND WEED TOOK UP ALL MY TIME. I STILL WENT TO LECTURES THOUGH NOT ALL OF THEM. MADE SURE I DID ALL MY CATS AND EXAMS. I JUST LOOKED FORWARD TO THE DAY I WILL BE DONE WITH SCHOOL. MY MUM HAD OTHER PLANS FOR ME, LIKE ME PURSUING MY MASTERS AND PHD, WELL THOSE WERE HER PLANS, I HAD MY PLANS.
THE YEAR ENDED SO FAST, I BARELY HAD TIME TO CATCH A BREATH. FORTUNATELY I DID NOT FAIL ANY UNIT IN MY THIRD YEAR BUT I GOT RELATIVELY LOW GRADES. THE FOLLOWING YEAR I WAS TO GO FOR AN ATTACHMENT FOR THREE MONTHS THEN BEGIN MY FOURTH AND FINAL YEAR. I WAS NOT WORRIED ABOUT ATTACHMENT I WAS REALLY GOOD AT PRACTICAL WORK. THEORY WAS MY BOREDOM. THE DIFFICULT PART WAS GETTING AN ATTACHMENT, BUT THAT TOO I WAS NOT WORRIED ABOUT, I COULD BE CHARMING IF I WANTED TO AND GET ANYTHING I WANT.
I WAS COPING BETTER THAN I EXPECTED BUT I KNEW THE FEELINGS WOULD CATCH UP WITH ME SOONER. WEED WAS NOW MY BEST FRIEND, I SMOKED EVERY SINGLE DAY AND THE DAYS I DID NOT SMOKE WAS BECAUSE I WAS TOO LAZY TO GET OUT OF BED. SEMESTER WAS DONE AND IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO GO BACK HOME. ANOTHER CHRISTMAS WITHOUT TEE. I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT TWO YEARS WERE OVER SINCE I FIRST MET HIM AND WHO KNEW IN TWO YEARS TIME I WOULD BE HERE. BUT, TRUST LOVE TO GIVE YOU A ROLLER COASTER.
IT WAS NOW TIME TO GO HOME, TEE AND I SAID OUR GOODBYES AND WELL I WASN'T EXACTLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SPENDING TIME WITH MY FAMILY, BUT I LOVED THAT I WOULD CHANGE MY ENVIRONMENT AND BE AWAY FROM TEE. I NEEDED TIME AWAY FROM HIM. I GOT HOME AND EVERYTHING WAS FINE. I DECIDED BEFORE THE YEAR ENDS I WOULD CONFESS MY SINS, WHAT I HAD DONE TO MY TWO BABIES.
SO I WENT TO CHURCH AND REALLY FOUGHT WITH THE DECISION FOR ALMOST FIVE HOURS, FINALLY I DECIDED TO GO SEE THE PRIEST AND GET IT OVER WITH, I MEAN WHATS THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN.
THE PRIEST KEPT SAYING THAT I KNOW SOME OF YOU ARE CATHOLICS BUT ARE REFUSING TO GO FOR CONFESSION, SO BEFORE THE DAY IS OVER MAKE SURE YOU DO. I GATHERED UP MY COURAGE AND WENT, I DECIDED I WOULD START WITH THE ABORTION AND MOVE ON TWO OTHER SINS, BUT I KNEW AS SOON AS I MENTIONED THE ABORTIONS, THE PRIEST WOULD NOT HEAR ANYTHING ELSE I HAD TO SAY.
I DID, AND AS I GUESSED I WAS CORRECT, ANYWAY HE GAVE ME SOME ADVICE AND WE TALKED A BIT AND SOME PRAYERS. AS SOON AS WE WERE DONE IT BEGAN TO RAIN. IT WAS LIKE HEAVENS WERE WAITING FOR ME TO WASH MY SINS AWAY. IT FELT GOOD. BUT DEEP DOWN,  I KNEW  I HAD NOT FORGIVEN MYSELF.
CHRISTMAS CAME AND I JUST STAYED AT HOME. I WAS NOT INTERESTED IN GOING OUT AND I MISSED TEE LIKE CRAZY, HE INVITED ME NEW YEARS AT THEIR HOME AND I DECIDED I WOULD GO. I HAD NEVER BEEN TO THEIR HOME COUNTRY AND I NEEDED TO GO TO A NEW PLACE, TRAVELLING JUST CLEARED MY THOUGHTS. LIFE HAD NEW PLANS FOR ME, COME THE FOLLOWING YEAR. I HAD NO IDEA HOW MUCH WAS WAITING FOR ME.